May 27: F Bison

My heart is still racing. Johnny and I came within 15 feet of slaughtering a family of bison…. and Lola. I think Lola would have got the short end of that deal. We were driving back from West Yellowstone, we didn’t drink at all thank god. It was about 1030pm, lightly raining, taking it slow. We came around a slight bend doing 35 or so and I noticed a disruption in the yellow dividing line. I couldn’t even tell it was bison until I was slamming on my brakes and noticed the lighter colored calves in the herd, you could only tell that there was something blocking the road and better stop like 100 feet ago. It was so close. I was convinced we were going to hit at least one of them.  There were probably 40 bison, all in the road. Lola stopped about 10 or 15 feet from the herd. I can relate to heart attack survivors. Holy shit. I think I was more scared than the herd of bison combined. My car came to a slightly crooked, abrupt stop, they just hung out for a minute, then walked right next to my car and beyond off into the night. I am so sick of these things. I found out tonight at the bar/restaurant where we watched the game that there are over 4000 bison in Yellowstone. Neat. Maybe we could cage them at night? Or put some reflectors or glow sticks around their neck? I wonder how many bison are hit every year…. Or how many cars are totaled hitting bison…. Or how many quills a porcupine has….. (30000, another trivia question from the menu where we ate) Next purchase = new headlights. Oh, and President Obama is coming to Yellowstone sometime this summer. He has to come to Old Faithful. Has to. How can the pres come to Yellowstone and not check out its biggest attraction with the fam? And you know they are gonna be hungry. Maybe they stop by one of the most iconic lodges in the nation for some lunch. Maybe I will clear his plate or refill his water, sneak a handshake in there and ask him what his thoughts are on the current situation in Pakistan, suggest that we offer them some bison at no charge, maybe that will get me an earpiece and a corner office in the white house..... Maybe……. Apparently Air Force One has been to West Yellowstone airport 4 times already in the past month or so to do…. something I assume.